“I felt like I wasn’t protecting my son, I felt guilty”

FHello, this Wednesday morning, July 3rd, Karina Rodriguez spoke to Claudio Ramos and Maria Botelho Moniz about the difficult phase she recently went through.

Currently training as a paramedic, without planning, Karina became pregnant with Giovani. “I didn’t expect anything. At first there was such a fear, I am 20 years old, what will I do?

But in May, things took a turn for the worse. Despite everything, he says, he believes it was God’s plan.

Pregnancy has always been up and down. He remembers that in the first trimester he lost blood and had to completely rest. But then everything was fine until he got scared again when they raised the possibility that Delman might have trisomy 21. That risk was later ruled out.

Everything was going well until at six months old, in early May, he had an ultrasound, which showed that Delman was putting pressure on the kidney. At the time, Karina felt “severe pain in her back.”

The infection had not yet been discovered, and he immediately began taking medication. On May 3, a bacterium was discovered that he said “killed his children.” In fact, I already had an infection, but I haven’t been diagnosed yet.

“I always said, ‘Son, get out of there. And he listened to me, because when the pain stopped, I felt that he was moving.” I really felt everything,” he shared.

She ended up staying at home and minding her own business when, on Thursday, not knowing what it would be, “she had a discharge that they said is normal during pregnancy.” “It was weird and I felt like there was something. [que não estava bem]”, he reported.

He called the doctor and he told him it would be ok. The kids kept moving. “Until the last moment they were with me“.

The day that marked the life of Karina Rodriguez

May 13 began to feel “pressure” in the lower abdomen, as if he had “menstrual pain”. She called the emergency room and ended up asking her godmother to take her to the hospital. “I felt that something was wrong“, he recalled, not knowing at the time that he would lose his boys.

She made her way to the hospital lying in a car, and as soon as she arrived at the hospital ward, the nurses came for her. “I immediately told him to forget about me, that I did not exist, that they [os bebés] that they were the future“, said.

In the ultrasound room, she asked that no information be kept from her, and later it was explained to her that she was giving birth and that her first child was born. “It’s still a little hard to remember everything that happened“, he confessed.

The godmother called Karina’s family, who were in Portugal, to celebrate the birthday of her son Fanny Rodriguez. Meanwhile, Karina’s partner, Giovani, who was working, also came to “run to the hospital”.

“When he came in, I was lying and talking to them. [bebés] and ask the Mother of God of Fatima for a miracle“, – he said, talking about the arrival of his companion in the hospital.

Then, he was told that the second child, Delman, might be saved but would be born with complications and would have to be confined to a wheelchair.. The decision, made at the last minute, did not make Karina hesitate. He wanted to save his son Delman at any cost.

“It wasn’t me that mattered to me, it was them.“, – she emphasized during a conversation with the presenters, also praising the medical team accompanying her.

Karina, she recalls, told her children that she always talked like them, “as if she were talking to a normal person, they reacted to everything.”

Loss of first child

“I start to cry, but it’s not from sadness. I was going to meet my son. When he held out his little hand, it was as if he was saying “hello, mommy.”“, he emphasized, speaking of the birth of Enzell.

“I just told him that he should leave when he wanted to, that everyone loved him very much and that he would have a great life there, but he would definitely live better up there. I told him that it takes a lot of courage to stay here, but it takes more to stay up there and look out for us, because it is very difficult to look out for a person. I see how my son reacts, tries to breathe, as I was warned.”, reported. “Seeing him trying to breathe and not being able to… it was the worst feeling you could ever have, for me he suffered.“, continued.

“The nurses caressed my son. I told them that he was handsome, that he looked like a mouse,” he said, saying that baby died 18 minutes after birth and who was always with him.

Loss of a second child

At the same time, Delman was still inside her abdomen and had to hold out for another three weeks before the birth of her second child. “I hid all my pain, no one noticed anything, only at the end“, said.

“He was fine, he had already taken the space of a normal baby, he was all elongated, all beautiful, always with his hands up… The worst thing was for me, the house was not safe, the environment was not stable. When the doctor asked me if I was all right, I said yes. He asked me if I was going to last three weeks, and I said that I had to last,” he added.

The companion immediately realized that Karine was unwell, but did not want him to talk to the medical team. Was, says, with a temperature of 42º, dehydrated, did not eat. He did some tests and the doctor came right away. Karina did not want her child to be born because she knew that she would lose him. “I felt like I wasn’t protecting my son, I felt guilty“, he confessed.

“Because of a bacterium, from where I don’t know, my uterus [que era a casa deles] I couldn’t take it. It’s hard for a woman to feel that some part of her is failing,” she added.They explained to me that without me there is no child. […] and i told him [ao médico]: “You are asking me to kill my son. I can’t do that, mom doesn’t do that'”, continuation.

But the boy was born two days later, on May 15, but this time Karina “slept” and woke up only after giving birth. The child also died 18 minutes later.

Before he finished, he emphasized that he had accepted an invitation to participate in the TVI program to tell his story to “warn that the infection is not just a urinary tract infection, it is what took your children from me.”

Read also: Sister Fanny Rodriguez gives first interview since losing twins